childlike

I try my best not complain about what I am going through. Especially when I see stories on facebook about children going through chemotherapy, or I read about bringing home the browns (heart wrenching story to follow). But yesterday was somewhat tramatic. I hate needles as it is. I am learning how to tolerate them though. I know what you are thinking, after four children I should be used to them by now. But I am not. I still ask for the smallest needle. My nurse dawn has been so wonderful. Yesterday, I had a new nurse. Dawn was on another floor training and my nurse yesterday was having a "refresher" in administering chemo. Let me start off by saying she was super sweet. But being someone afraid of needles, I of course got the nurse who poked me not once but, but twice. Then had to have the head nurse come over to readjust the needle (by twisting the needle) because there was no blood return, so it wasn't in correctly. My nurse also dressed the needle with tegaderm, which is something that is done after the needle is properly working. So, yes, I had to have that ripped off while it was attached to my line. Today I go for my shot that will boost my white blood count. It is very painful because it is basically manufactured bone marrow. So even a hug hurts. I may be 28 years old but I feel very childlike today. I would give anything to go home and have my parents hold me. Just like when I was a small child. I try my best not to complain. Things could be worse. But...I am only human. Here is a link to what kind of port I have and the the type of needles that are used, if you are interested. If it doesn't work, you may have to copy and paste. http://www.norcalvascular.com/expertise/pid:305/id:453/ And as always thank you for taking the time to read this. Thank you for your support and continued prayers.